seasons of emotion

im trying....

2010-03-03T20:24:00.002+08:00

i thought I've been doing fine..
having this people surround me with happy thoughts, crazy deeds..
its already been a week that I'm doing great
without any trace of you in my system...
then you shot me back..
when you texted me one day..
i once thought that you wanna be us together.. but i can't ...

its just too painful...

i can't accept that..

now that we're tryin' to communicate with each other again..
i think its not good..
coz it made me sicker..
than the first week

i found myself curved like a ball in the bed,
while listening to this sad songs..
why did it affect me like this much??
i thought im ok..
i really thought that im ok..
but i wasn't.........

hope that i could recover as much as possible with all this love sick thing...
i hate this coming to me..

reactionary

2010-02-12T20:58:00.001+08:00

there are times that we could not understand..
but when the thought of getting angry crossed your mind..
another crosses..
and that is.. not hurting that person..
its always a good feeling when all you wanna do is to be happy..
but then, its not normal(I’ve realized and someone made me realized )that it’s a boring situation when someone just keeps on treating you like a baby..
lalalala! of course it is hun..
relationships aren’t sparky when there’s no any FIGHT

it makes you know about the person more... and deeper
specially on how he perceives things...

now ok.. i will be more on the reactionary side..
and forget about "ignoring" yeah..

cathy-johan date at pbb house

2010-01-15T22:07:00.000+08:00

yeah i know this sounds crazy but i totally envy cathy..
i think what johan did when he dated cathy is much way better than hermes..
with the games .. and action speaks louder than words man..

hhmmnnn.. those stuff are so sweet...

now im longing for someone.. when i saw on the t.v. that they're dating..

T____T

i miss my love..so much..

need to get back to what im doing now..

xoxo..

COPAR (Community Organizing Participatory Action Research) week one

2010-01-13T19:22:00.000+08:00

tallying

interview proper

cooking something for lunch wew!

(i really like this shot.. its like i've used a DSLR cam here)

at park and ride..

mam sandalo checks my groupmates clinical bag

As-is, Batangas was the given community for us groups BSN 4P1, P2(my group) and P3.

usually the activities done for the first day was courtesy call to the mayor but they weren't able to see the mayor coz he's not around i think they were guided by some person over the hall.

we arrived at as-is around quarter to 11am, it was a warm day.. you could feel the brush of the cold air at your skin and it is perfect, not a sunny day for us tired students with lots of things carried.

we also meet our new foster parent and what i really love about batangas is that even if they have a small house, they have this minimalist style and very organized house and ive noticed that they always have two rooms elevated.

at around 2:30 we started doing our survey and pictured some areas from which we sought as the communities probable problem

6:00pm- we went back home
8pm- went back to the barangay for tallying of the data's gathered

10pm- we went home again and the C.I.'s did their roving for each of the houses

the next day.. it was departure day from as-is and that was around 10am

always been delighted by your presence

2009-12-05T22:27:00.000+08:00

now playing: new day by tamar kaprelian

maybe you've never asked how much i appreciate your efforts..
how much i value your laugh, you being silly
you singin your lalalalav songs..your humor
the small childish fights..
i treasure all of those...

those are the simple moments that i could only have right now..
i always think what will happen the next day

but a.t.m.,MAybe all i can do is wait.. and not think for what will tomorrow can give me.. instead what we can give..
let our feelings flow

lalalalala...

you're still special to me..
don't doubt.

guys never do this when you go out on a date

2009-12-04T23:41:00.000+08:00

i saw this gorgeous girl with this guy..
ionno if they're dating but..
this guy was wearing slippers and actin like "hey, i am me , i feel like home"
but then the girl was so pretty in dress and the guy dresses so inappropriately..eeww..

thats a down for the guy...

tsk tsk.

these are the other things ive read before from a magazine:
stop checkin your phone when youre on a date- leave the phone... its not the phone youre dating... its her..
if you're watching, then watch.. stop rumbling like a sissy...

wear things appropriately.. ok...

drop it like its HAAWWWTT!!!!

2009-12-03T23:31:00.000+08:00

it was last nov.27 when we partied me,rea,tosca and pia..

we drop by first at Gerardo's (somewhere in abs-cbn)

at around 12mn, we ran to Guilly's Island immediately and yeah babeh!!
em feelin teh vibe!! i can imagine boracay with all that beat and all the people are ready to partaayyy!!!!!

ready to swing tat hips, pop tat chest and do some head bang babeh!!

it was awesome..
im feelin teh high!!!!!

miss partyin like for how many months ago.. since ive been to clubs..awwww
hearts hearts!!!!

xoxo

creepy crap gloomy thursday

2009-12-03T15:19:00.000+08:00

teh freaky thing i've dreamt about..
LADY GAGA!!! kissin me lol!
eeewwww now i feel like listenin to katy perry's i kissed a girl song nyahahahaa!

eeekkksss!

anyway forget about tat dream..

i love things happenin unexpectedly..
wakin up wit a lil headache and then me readin a msg. of my mate tat we dont have a class today wooohhh!!

good for mah day since i need to do and finish lots of things for school...

well until now.. i stil have my headache..
ive been eating ice cream, bread and drinkin some sweetened tea but still
my headache doesnt go...
awww.. why was it?

im tryin to do relaxation techniques so to avoid medicines im tryin not to get much wit med. you know as much as possible..

thats all for teh day.. hope to finish my to do list:
- finish my NCP, PSP,PRIORITIZATION
-edit research (boooorriiiinnnngggg)
-review(ionno what to do in this life)

wooot !!!

so long mi amigos!

hearts

no matter how calm and peaceful the sea is... the waves continuously graces

2009-11-30T11:15:00.000+08:00

and it was monday...
waking up in the busy head of manila.. again of course Thank Godness..

holla amiga i was awakened by the noise and then i looked for my ipod which i remembered switchin it off last night coz i slept with it again with the speaker on and on max. volume lol!

i played "shadow of the day" by linkin park yeaahh.. it gives me a good vibe!

i just closed my eyes and saw my moms text to me and it was sent like 2:00 in the morning holly gracious.. she's really depressed this days.. and it hurts me feelin her in tat state but i just hope that everything will be ok soon...
i want xmas to be perfect.. and DECEMBER and the coming JANUARY..

duty later this evening.. hello to new patients and to new cases and to our new c.i.

black then a bitch came from nowhere..

2009-05-24T15:36:00.000+08:00

my eyes hurt then..
i decided to open it..
i looked for my phone..
then i saw ate preparing her shirt..
for the mass..
so i said that i'll be rushing for my bath..
so i wear a black dress and a skinny jeans..
then..
voila
we took a ride on a jeepney
then went to UST church

atelaarni was there na waiting for us..

so after the mass..
we went to SM sanlazaro..
and then we went to ate mae

then..
we walked a little..
then..

we ate at AVENEDO'S
PIZZATERIA

gosh..
its a pig out sunday..

so after we ate alot..

we take lots of walking in the mall and..
then went to the department store..

i love those blue caps..
for girls..
damn..

then when we went down to the ascalator..
we saw someone..
the bitch..
and she's hurrying ..
obviously..

with the guy..

i dont hella care..
and i dont have any plans of greeting her..
either..

Forgive me lord for being such a bitch but i need to..
haha

thank God its saturday: lahat ng nasa isip ko ngeon

2009-05-23T17:40:00.000+08:00

well
eto lang naman ang pinakaaantay kong
araw
ang SABADO..
kasi..
pahinga day
at
mkkpagnet
hehee
at poker

asan kaya tong si tatang?
nagtext kala ko o.l. pdn..
di ako nakapagreply ala ako load
hehehe

adik talga..

arrghhj..
inaantok na naman ako..
last ng round to ng poker uuwi nako..

blog lang
tpos tingin ng pixur ni cory kennedy sa site nia..

then,
uwi nako.. di nako nakapagtype..
ahahahahahaha

sleep i love it..

2009-05-15T23:25:00.000+08:00

this cramming thing with projects is makin me sick...
its new to me for this year..
grabbin the midnight-til-morning
writing about my patient..

i think its not comprehensive anymore coz
im rushin alot..

i scheduled my body to sleep at 3am then alarmed my phone at 5 o'clock in the morning..

thank God for the perseverance that i got yesterday ..
to finish it.. but i wasn't able to..

so after the case presentation,
i took a nap..
but it resulted not only as a nap
but a 4 hours sleep..

wow..
that's a breaking record for me..
then..

10pm.. i went to the net shop
type down my part with the case presentation,
update my sites..
then olah..!

went back home
yet my head felt so heavy..
when i lay down to bed..

so listen to some songs..
reasons to love you by meiko
in repeat..
shut up and let me go by the ting tings..

they're my happy song..

but still..
i can't sleep.. awwww

then i woke up..
12 noon..
oh my..
haha!
unbelievable for me..

hehe!!

sleep is very important to me..
that i've exchange for a lot of things
just to have it...

its a satisfying thing..
for me.. =)

hey ms. you aint freakin me out..

2009-05-12T14:54:00.000+08:00

we all got different characteristics..
some maybe tame
but some maybe bold.

just LIKE any other people who wanted to
give a different shot.

dra.valino, our c.i.
for may 11-15, 10-6am shift..

she quoted " the only permanent thing is change"

i think she's kind, though with a "be-snappy" attitude..

hey hey hey
our groups alive again even if its a graveyard shift..
and the word for the day was
"TARAY"
and that came from "me"

A H1N1( hemoglutinin neuraminidase)

2009-05-10T15:39:00.000+08:00

it was cool to know about simply the pandemic
that is spreading throughout the countries right now..

we had our duty yesterday at Quezon City General Hospital
and our preceptor specializes with the infection control of the disease

she was mrs. Batulina
and
she thinks that she was appointed at that particular area of the hospital
when she did a study about nosocomial infections
during her thesis days (required for completion of masteral)

i always saw it on tv but i always fail to search for it on the internet..
so i asked our preceptor if what does it mean..
the A H1N1
yeah..
it means

A HEMOGGLUTININ NEURAMINIDASE..
a 3 strained virus that came from the 1.bird with a flu then passed to the PIG
then
a 2.human with flu
passed also to the pig then
the 3.pig passed it to the human
then the human
passed it again to another human
and here comes the history of the
invading disease..

about the treatment..
its time for you to get vein..
do that ol hand washing or with an alcohol base disinfectant..

symptoms..
they're like your common flu..
with fever, runny nose, cough, body achings...

for more info. go to cdc.com

its an escape with the unscapable..

2009-05-05T18:08:00.000+08:00

it was tuesday morning and even though
i am hearing noises..
i sleep again..
never even bothering those noises that i heard..

as i swam deep into the dream world..
i was back in my past..
not in my previous experiences but a "Place in the past"
so.. there i was..
i ran into a small house with no ceiling..
all i know about that moment is that..
i really need to hide from the kidnappers..

then, i saw a cloth and a dark area of the room where i thought that the kidnappers
won't see me
but then the light striked through where i am hiding
so i get out of that corner and
i saw that the kidnapper was coming
so i hid behind the wall.. then i tried climbing up since there's no ceiling
but there are lots of people in that place..

as he entered the room..
i couldn't recall what happened next
but i remember that
i was sitting at the chair of that small house
and then..
i was grabbing every thing and throw it to the kidnapper coz he's infront of me
and i looked at the ruler..
i was crying and i saw no. 90 and thought that it was my heart beat
my throat ached because i was crying so loud...

then..
i was awake now..
it was still fresh to me that
i am panting from my dreams..

then david texted me..
and my uncle said that it was time for breakfast now..

what a strange dream...

happy surprises, so simple yet most treasurable..

2009-05-04T15:12:00.000+08:00

uurrgghhh!!! it was saturday afternoon when me and my cousin can't do anything
so..
we both slept that afternoon
and
when we woke up..
yeah
felt hungry..

hahaha!

we just watched tv
then kuyajosh arrived with barbecues yey!!!

woah!
somebody brought a food
so we ditch the barbecue and it enlightened us both
hahaha!
then..

that night,
i wanted to go out..
but i didn't know where to..

so i invited my cousin
if we could take a walk outside
the streets of manila..

after we ate our dinner,
we walked out at the house
headed our way to dapitan street

there
we saw the previous apartment where our parents lived before
and event the parlor that my uncle owned..
i also saw the bakery where my uncle told me to buy breads..
ahahaha!

and i also remember that i had playmates at that place..

so we just walked and walked till we reached ..ummn..
i forgot the name of the street
but it was kinda far now..

we've discussed a lot of things while walking and i enjoyed it..
you know..
simple things shared with others..
that's a total boredom killer..

it was a total of an hour - "walking"
when we came back home
it took only a minute then i saw my cousin,, sleeping already while i'm wide
awake..

aww
this is my problem..
it took so hard for me this days or even sometimes to sleep..
i think i slept 3am already..

never estimate other's kindness

2009-04-30T17:07:00.000+08:00

somethings different from yesterday..
the late arrival of our group at the hospital (not really late, i mean not our usual departure from mendiola which is
5:40 am)
and the unexpected things...

like..
you never get shackled until it starts nagging you..

i thought that it'll be the same day..
a chill day..
but then..
you know..
its kinda scary when kindness battled with responsibility..
and that was our part with mrs. agustin
her as kindness and us, responsibility..

i know what to do in that particular moment..
yet i was swayed by the tardiness of my groupmates so i joined in,,
but then..
i never thought that i should've followed my instincts,,
follow what i had inside my head which is to work on my own..

you must move on from the summers hangover to you..
we're back again from the original world of students..

the story was this:
our c.i. mam agustin asked us to read our clients chart
after the checking of attendance inside the room from where we are staying..

then..
8am.. we've taken vital signs and read our patients chart..
after
that
we all went inside the room
while my other groupmates are palying their ipod touch, watching at their phones
to kill their boredom..
from that moment that we are relaxing..
we've forgotten our responsibilities..

it was already enough that we have been given enough time from the past few days
to relax and be oriented..

then mamagustin entered at our room, everybody hide their phones and stopped any other business..
she asked if we had given our patients meds..
and at that moment..
we've rushed to our places and went back to work..
our patients meds we're not yet available when my groupmate checked it..
so we've waited and then..
her and my other partner in that patient gave the meds
and i looked for the action of the patients meds.
after that..
mamagustin called us and recalled the 5 R's of giving meds
drugstudy and then..
she commented on what she had observed from our group..
that we are so relaxed and haven't been out at the room
and forget about our responsibilities to our patients..

she's right we've gone way tardy..
and so..
the next time that we've taken vs
we checked and looked at our patients chart for updates.
and we've payed attention to them..

give importance even if its a lil while

2009-04-28T16:54:00.000+08:00

hey wadup..
blog..
here i am again reporting as usual..
except that the head ache was the only unusual thing for me today..
i was able to sleep last night so good and yet
even though i got a good night sleep..
i wasn't able to escape being a sleepy head at our duty at capitol,
don't know why..
it seemed like
every time that i adjust my body clock
it draws me to that inviting dream world of fantasy..
there's the bed at the ward that we've occupied
yet i do not trust the sheets of the mattress
coz i can't be sure if it was changed
so i didn't lay down freely my head on the pillows nor on the bed itself..
just kneeding my other elbow as a stand for my head..
and im really sleepy..

it was really funny how you can simply ignore things like
when they teased me with macoy..
yeah.. i mean.. i've told them i got a crush on him..
but it was nothing.. not a big deal either..
i got a crush on him before coz he's a funny guy... hahaha!

then he rides with the jokes they're throwing on us..
like
he would give me a brush on my hand..
hahahaha!
that was really funny though
and i think i can't really forget this group (3p-2)

they give me a different world being with other people..
and it was cool.. and being noisy was just the side of it..

their was a little mixed up with the scheds. (of our duty) don't know with them..
they're crazy pulling us all out at the duty..
it wasnt a joke wakin up early you know..
and the money we're spending just to be there...

so after all the crazy day..
i took a nap..
yeah and now..
it was the cause of my headache...

bblluurrr...

kuyachris.. said goodbye to us , me and my couz tricia at the net shop..
woah.. i didn't notice that it was him behind us..
just until i smell his perfume.. it smells good and i loved it...

so i think that was all im gonna report for this day..
til next time blog..
c yahz!

sometimes.. what comes in your mouth are more true..

2009-04-27T15:58:00.000+08:00

the duty was just a sweat out
we all went home early
except for those who went on detour at the mall..

love it..
yet i wasnt able to have a nice sleep last night
i dont know..
i've done alot of things yesterday like..
goin round recto and to bustillos..
lots of walking really...

hope to get a good night sleep today..
yeah!

challenge yourself to change for a while

2009-04-26T15:53:00.000+08:00

what i've been up to this day..
well
i woke up 9:00 in the morning
brushed my teeth then took a bath
coz i'll be hittin recto
to buy some materials for my clinical bag..

kinda slept late last night again
coz im cravin for the songs that i'm supposed to be downloading last night yet
i can't coz they're all sleeping.
then.. after that i ate two squares of ham then..
12nn i went to recto.
i arrived 1:30 pm..

gosh..
it took me so long to find that fuckin paper
(newsprint) and i havent seen one...

so i decided to have those checklist needed for our duty to be xeroxed..

then bye recto,, went home and ate nilagang baboy for my lunch
and after that

i went online to update my accounts
chatted with cris and jaypee...

whew..

anything i can do to kill boredom?

2009-04-25T15:16:00.000+08:00

woah its really nakakaloka when you can't do anything inside
a boring room
even though you're filled with movies..
arrgghh..
crap..
i think its kinda preparin me on our hectic duty this week..
hope that everything will be fine..

totally love the scandalous manhatan's elite movie, Gossip girl
hahahaha!

bitchy babeh!

boring weekend..

2009-04-23T15:39:00.000+08:00

our summer duties haven't started yet..
so what i really wanna do is to hang out in somebody else's place
just to kill boredom..
so last tuesday.. i went to david's place( my friend)
i played wedding dash..
then we ordered foods from KFC..
i'm totally lovin so much their gogo..
i think its their guilt-free food..
thanks for the tomatoes and the lettuce in it..
i want to ask for more of it.. totally..
then we did net surfing for 2 hours..
i've searched about my fave fashion icon, cory kennedy and peaches geldof..
i mean gosh..
who wouldn't feel envy with their lifestyle but i think
i'll get envy with their fashion statement and the set of shots that peaches and cory had
in the net..
now its thursday and i really hate staying at home except if i had lots of things to do.
so i watch gossip girl..
and totally lovin the guy named penn badgely..
gorgeous..
i wanna have a hobby like him..
wonderful..